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Film Review #7: Fantasy Life

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A film for those who think Lake Bell kinda sucks. Regal Theatres Monday's Mystery Movie (3/16) was revealed to be Fantasy Life , written and directed by Matthew Shear. Warning: there are spoilers ahead. Shear concurrently stars in the film as Sam, an anxious tax lawyer who pays a visit to his therapist after being let go from his job. As Sam exits the office, his therapist's wife/secretary suggests that he babysit their granddaughters. Her son David and his wife Dianne have three daughters between the ages of 6 and 11, and at a generous rate of $300 per night, this setup might have worked well for Sam -- had he not fallen for Dianne (Amanda Peet). Dianne is a former actress who has lost her sense of purpose following a decade of unemployment. When Sam enters her life, she finally feels seen again. Meanwhile, her husband David is portrayed as an alcoholic, wanna-be rockstar who leaves the continent on tour and practically thrusts his wife into the arms of their "manny...

Film Review #6: Undertone

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So you want to catch a movie released on Friday the 13th . . . In an era of horror dominated by jump scares, Ian Tuason's Undertone is a minimalistic film that relies almost entirely on sound and unconventional camera shots to create an unsettling atmosphere. The protagonist of this story is Evangeline "Evy" Babig (played by Nina Kiri), who runs a horror podcast alongside her off-screen friend Justin (Adam DiMarco). Warning: there are spoilers ahead . As the plot develops, Justin receives an anonymous email containing ten audio files, recorded by an unknown couple -- Mike and Jessa.  Mike has recorded Jessa at night to capture evidence of her talking and singing in her sleep.  During their podcast, Evy and Justin begin playing these recordings in reverse to uncover secret messages within Jessa's ramblings. Mike, kill all. Lick the blood off. Come in, Abyzou. In her breaks from podcasting, Evy has been tasked with caring for her comatose mother. She feels very guilty a...

Film Review #5: Hoppers

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Who doesn't love a self-aware animated film? "Guys, this is like Avatar !" exclaims Mabel Tanaka, protagonist of Daniel Chong's  Hoppers . "This is nothing like Avatar !" cries Dr. Sam in response. Spoiler alert... it was kind of like Avatar . Warning: there are actual spoilers ahead . Pixar's latest installment revolves around a teenage girl with a particular affinity for animals.  Inspired by her late grandmother, Mabel seeks to protect a nearby glade from being destroyed by (perceived antagonist) Mayor Jerry's freeway project.  After discovering experimental technology allowing a human mind to “hop” into a robotic animal body, Mabel transfers her consciousness into a robotic beaver and decides to live among the animals to better understand their society. While in disguise, she befriends Mammal King George and helps unite a variety of species in the forest while battling a guilty conscience about her true identity. In this film's climax, the a...

Film Review #4: Slanted

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Regal Theatres present Monday's Mystery Movie: Horror Edition (3/9) .  For just $5, fans gain access to a movie before its official release date, with the sole caveat being that the film remains a mystery to all until house lights are dimmed. This week's film was revealed to be  Slanted , starring Shirley Chen and Mckenna Grace.  Warning: there are spoilers ahead. Written and directed by Amy Wang, Slanted tells the story of an insecure Chinese-American girl who undergoes experimental ethnic modification surgery to appear white. As the story progresses, our protagonist Joan Huang becomes Jo Hunt in an effort to gain peer acceptance and be voted Prom Queen -- to the exasperation of both her parents and best friend. While there are elements of horror, specifically in the film's final scene as Joan frantically attempts to tear off her new face, it was tough as an audience member to shake the expectation of a horror film and adjust to this Disneyesque story about societal pres...

Film Review #3: The Bride!

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Reimagine Bride of Frankenstein . Make it quirky. Make it intriguing. And then make it drag somewhat aimlessly for over two hours. Welcome to 2026 cinema. Warning: there are spoilers ahead . Written and directed by Maggie Gyllenhaal, The Bride! stars Jessie Buckley and Christian Bale, both of whom give strong performances despite an often convoluted and purposeless narrative. The film's premise is simple enough: a lonely Frankenstein approaches Dr. Euphronius with the request to create a suitable companion for him. Together, they decide to dig up and reanimate a corpse.  Bring Ida to life. Evanescence would approve, right? Throughout the film, the pair are pursued intently by law enforcement for a variety of crimes, including (but not limited to) Ida's choice to bite a police officer's tongue out of his mouth, à la Rick Grimes. Ultimately, "Frank" proposes to Ida, the reanimated corpse of his life, but his proposal is rejected moments before he is fatally shot in...

Film Review #2: Scream 7

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Ghostface is back .  "Show me four popcorn right now, or you're dead." (A little humor for those who have played Funko's Scream party game.) Warning: there are spoilers ahead . In the latest installment of the Scream franchise, Sidney Prescott has built a new life for herself in Pine Grove, Indiana. She is married to a police officer and has a teenage daughter named Tatum, who will quickly become the focal point of Ghostface's attacks. As typical of a Scream film, a slew of innocent people are murdered in brutal fashion to build tension that our protagonist or other beloved franchise staples could be next. (McKenna Grace characters really can't catch a break in these films lately.) We are actually treated to three Ghostface killers in this edition, as Gale Weathers makes her dramatic entrance by running over the first masked man with her car -- a former mental institute patient by the name of Karl Gibbs. As the film progresses, it is ultimately revealed that...

Film Review #1: Psycho Killer

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Nothing quite says "welcome to the blog" like a review of some run-of-the-mill slasher film. Alexa, play "Psycho Killer" by Talking Heads. Written by Andrew Kevin Walker and directed by Gavin Polone, Psycho Killer tells the story of a police officer (portrayed by Georgina Campbell) who tracks down a serial killer after witnessing her husband's violent murder while on duty. Richard Joshua Reeves (The Slasher) is a Satanist who slaughters a number of people in a variety of graphic ways throughout the film, including a pharmacist to fuel his drug addiction, and a priest whose blood he drinks quite vigorously. Charming. Reeves is able to maneuver in anonymity as the public believes that he died many years prior, having reportedly been shot by a prison guard he attacked while on death row (for -- you guessed it -- mass murder). His ultimate mission this time around? To destroy a nuclear power plant in Harrisburg, Pennsylvania in a suicide mission that is said to ...